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death doom destruction

[ website | red rum records ]
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[30 Sep 2003|05:37pm]
My New LJ name is


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show! [21 Sep 2003|07:24pm]
[ mood | tired ]

Ok, My new Lj name will be Obfuscated

i havent posted in awhile so heres whats going on.
I play bass for Getto Death, one of the most kick ass bands in La right now, if you havent heard us, where the fuck have you been?
And this means im in a better band than all of CArleys Ex boyfreinds. So yeah HA you fuckers suck =P

I played my first show last night *ive just joined last month**
and i dunno i played pretty well. It was at the Crest, with detriment, *who fucking shredded the shit before us* Theese guys were nice man i had a lot of fun.

Before the show Alex bought me a beer and some ciggs to loosen me up before i went on stage, i just fucked around out side cuz well im only 17 and you had to be 21 to get in, so im smokin, drinkin bud lite, HAnsons Energy, a coke, and eating the Death metal Candy, "MAMBA!" yeah, then i go inside im not carded or anything so i sit down next to Chepo, Dame hands me a beer. and we wait till we go on, IM getting sick of detriment playing so long haha, There bad ass but i wanted to play.

So we play, Fuck up the intro cuz chepos plug falls out of the wall, so we play the heavy part again and go into obfuscate, i played the whole thing clean, Backyard yard Grave Yard, Clean as fuck, Screams on point too, Peel the skin, clean as fuck, redrum, clean,first attempt, clean! even though the time was weird in that song. Then, travmatized, dame said "this song is called travmatized, Nelson dosent really know it but we are gonna play it any way." SO we play i just rock out.

Eric switches to bass, to play HAmmer smashed FAce, and half a face,then the drummer from detriment came up to sing, then i go back on to play the outro, then dame and i play reign in blood and the beging to black magic and we pack up. I getting props from people i know, people i dont know, I got a good job from fucking the Socal legend mike Foreman, Matt, and bagin, were all amped it was bad. Ryan was like so its official? and im like yup ands like ALLRIGGGGGHHHTTTT

i got props from detriment, hung out, talked to the guys for a little bit then went back to grammas.

Carleys is gonna post some pics of of the show like tomorrow

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Good bye [05 Jul 2003|05:25am]
[ mood | awake ]

This maybe long, or what ever. i cant sleep, its fucking almost 5.

Im offcially tired of LJ, i could careless what any of you people do. Ok, im sorry for hurtful words. But yeah man, fuck it. and now words of wisdom

Getting mad and getting to other people personal life is stupid. Live your own life, dont judge others, well that much. Remember not everyone is as perfect as you, and not everybody has it so good. Remain open minded, try new things dont stay in your little box all the time, complaining about bogus shit. Try drugs! then just when you start to like them, stop your becoming a loser addict. Have sex, why not, you only live once, but then....dont ruin your life by getting pregnant and fucking that ONE life up. If your gonna take risks, make sure you cover your ass soooo much, like birthcontrol condoms what ever. Life is just a bunch of either or. Ok, do this but make sure you be careful. Taking risks is fun, and so enjoy able, but remeber there maybe a price to pay.
Dont make such big deals out of things, like death, its gonna happen who gives a flying fuck. Dont be a racist bastard, i could careless of the color of your skin, i hate for who the you are, for what you do, and how you act.
Be thankful as fuck for what you have. No one should really be unhappy because it could always be worse. Oh i hate my mother because she wont let me have pie, then go visit some people in the hospital and say that, then people in the hospital, go visit some third world country and complain about your illness, and people in the third world country, go visit a graveyard, and even though your suffering so much, thank the fucking lord, your not alone, and not six feet under. Its hard as fuck to be human because of the fucking mind. And people are always fucking with mine and i fucking hate it all. I think to much, i get depressed over stupid shit. Which is beyond me because i should be happy.
I may have gone through a lot of shit, but so many other people have gone through worse. Most people dont deserve what they have, i know i dont, what did i do to deserve this life that i have? I just exsist, and i get all this great stuff, i wish other people were so lucky, i have a loving family, a loving girl freind....Hell i know she tries, and shes made some mistakes, but who dosent? Maybe i knonw her the best....Maybe i dont know her at all. But being with her, and looking into her eyes, i become less skeptical, That or shes a REALLY GOOD FUCKING LAIR! and is fooling the fuck outta me, then again, im so far away why would she waste her time on lil ol me. See stupid shit!
Everybody has a crutch, religion, drugs, drinking, or LJ! Mine, is music, and it was LJ but you know.....
Who knows i might just be blowing hot air up all your asses and ill post here next week, or maybe not.
Will i smoke pot again, chances are i will, but for now i dont need it. Same with alcohal, i didnt need any of this shit before morgan died, it was just something to throw down an empty hole, but now i have somthing to fill that hole **hahaha SICK HUH! i know what your thinking you gutter minded bastard but this next part will be funny** and thats Carley, Carley you fill my hole. **told you =P**
Am i a weird teen ager, because i love and respect and actually hang out with my parents? And for the most part listen to what they say, My dad told me to be "careful" when Carley came over, we were home alone, and if we wanted he could have fucked! But you know... we didnt, and we didnt care. We didnt have to. Maybe i will one day, sex isnt that important. I lost my virginity when i was 15, do i regret it....not really.
Your life can be taken at anytime, so suicide is stupid, I mean you go to all this trouble one day, and you know the next day you could be hit by a bus, and you wasted all that time and effort and pain. HAha never thought about it that way? Life is constant russian roulette. i could be shot right now............ok it didnt happen.
Self mutilation is fun when you have a freind.
ok, all this shit is random, and just thoughts, dont listen to me, im a fucking loser.
Theese are just how i see things, and how i think, i try to be laid back, i mean what the use of getting up tight about a lot of things,is a waste of energy.
And now some shout outs Nigga.
Carley, im in love with you what can i say, im a fool =P
Kali i lo you Bk
Lisa......your fucking weird! but good to talk to about just random shit thanks for putting up with it.
ok this got stupid quick! Most of you know how to contact me, if you dont, comment and ill let you know. Good bye.

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Another post wow [04 Jul 2003|11:53pm]
[ mood | worried ]

I burned my arm with a god damn lighter, lighting fire works out in front with Ralf and maria and their kids. We were talking about all the crazy shit Morgan and Adam and i used to do with the illegal fire works. Like almost setting dads oldsmobile on fire, throwing a m-80 in a glass Jar, Morgan lighting the home made fire work in side house then slamming it in the toilet. =( the fourth of july really sucks with out Morgan, or Adam. Well Morgans dead, and adam just dissappeared of the face of this earth. I wonder how he is doing... god hes gotta be like 23-24 now. I saw him maybe once after morgans death. This sucks, all my child hood freind move away, Atleast i still know where JP is shit, well i kinda do. haha allright this was interirly too long BAH.

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Shit for $ale [04 Jul 2003|08:08pm]
[ mood | morose ]

Anybody wanna buy a Dunlop Crybaby 535Q it works ill let it go for about 75 bucks, i paid about 125 for it.
Or a Digitech rp100 slightly used no battery back, ill let that go for about 50 bucks normally 100. Let me know, i need some crash, i got to many a thing to buy, a morley pedal, some fucking smack, and some doses and about a quad, no to mention a kegger, and thai hookers. Yeah and an emerald ring......a really nice one, but hey you didnt hear that from me! If i sell this shit, im throw a huge party come on now....help my cause out!
\m/doom on\m/

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i dunno seeking truth and wisdom yeah thats me [04 Jul 2003|05:04pm]
[ mood | numb ]

Your past life diagnosis:
I don't know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.
You were born somewhere in the territory of modern Borneo around the year 1550.
Your profession was that of a farmer, weaver or tailor.
Your brief psychological profile in your past life:
Seeker of truth and wisdom. You could have seen your future lives. Others perceived you as an idealist illuminating path to future.
The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:
Your lesson is to develop a kind attitude towards people, and to acquire the gift of understanding and compassion.
Do you remember now?

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uh yeah [03 Jul 2003|06:07pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

Bliss, turned to sorrow,
i feel so.... hollow now.
I hate this, distance.
Sweet sweet taste,
i long for thee

My soul cries out

Today was cool, yeah. IM not gonna bore you with details of my meaningless stupid life. HAVE FUN =)

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Yeah [02 Jul 2003|07:03pm]
Everything needs to stop. To many people Care, to many people act like fucking 12 years old. It all needs to stop, its sickening. All of this, makes me sick. You all make me sick. im going to go vomit in disgust.
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[01 Jul 2003|07:53pm]
[ mood | None exsistant ]

Human Contact is impossible
i want to rip out there eyes
so they dont see me
I am a horrible person
good bye. ;)

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[01 Jul 2003|10:43am]
where have all the flowers gone

i was never mad
i never hated you
i never wished you any harm
i did not spin a web of lies
i never tried to deceive you in anyway

You stab me in the back
you tell me lies
you say you love me
how can you,
why did you waste you time

i wasnt that important
why did you make such
an effort to hurt me?
Why would you torture me so.
Heaven turned to hell
white turned black
as the crimson river flows
i feel im alive

numb all over
i feel nothing
am i dead?
do i just mearly exsist
i shed no tears
only flesh

Your Sin

My Angel
a demon in disguse
do you care at all for me
or do you take pleasure in my suffering

You know how i felt
my love for you was pure
I dont know you anymore
the knife twists
a sublte pinch

And blood comes raining
From my eyes
All i see is pain
all i know is suffering

Death is my escape
From your evil deeds
from you and your sin
Have him
but first,
finish the death
you have started

Take the knife
My love
finish me
slit my throat

blood is everywhere any way
what have you to lose?
Have him take him
im worthless
i retch in horror

to see what you do to each other
sickens me
it makes me cry out
another mans touch
has graced your pale skin

Finish me,
im in too much pain
end my suffering
you know you hate me
finish me
kill me
make me no more
i cant exsist with this pain
kill me,
i am nothing to you
kill me
i hate this
kill me
for eternity
the truth
as i die.
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Born from ashes * a new hate* [30 Jun 2003|04:52pm]
[ mood | cynical ]

I rub my eyes
The light so bright
it blinds me
Hell fire burns
Intense heat
it melts my flesh

In hell
Dreams of damntions
have come to pass
this is my hell
the one you threw me in

Through the fire i am reborn
From the ash i arise
i look up to see my master
satan standing sweetly smiling

You serve me now boy,
You work for Hate
kill the lights in lovers eyes
murder the children
kill everything
burn all in your path.

obliterated by love
i had no choice
i must detroy the good in the world
make then see how i see
Sinners all of you,
i was one like that
not giving a fuck about others
Souless evil burns from with in
let the massacre begin

i draw my scythe
your head at my feet
the first kill felt good
but not as good as the next

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today i bought 5 cds 72.24 Feck [30 Jun 2003|04:09pm]
Old man child-in defiance of existance
Incantation-the infernal storm
Decapitated-the first damned
shape of despair- angel of distress **sigh sob**
Katationia- tonights decision

Black Death Doom
As i wallow in my worthless sorrows muahaha
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Day one [30 Jun 2003|10:34am]
[ mood | dead ]

I woke up,
really? yeah, i actually woke up.
I was praying for death,
i try to pick up the peices
but the ends are sharp
like broken glass

My hands
bloody from my attempts
i leave them there
i failed,
Maybe im not as strong as said to be
MAybe im just a pitiful weakling

Im just a fucking fool

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Well here i go [30 Jun 2003|01:48am]
[ mood | dead ]

I hate Fake people, i hate them with a burning passion.
THe one person i thought i could trust, just totaly obliterated me. I am truly destroyed. As i extinguish burning matches on my arm, you dont care. i adore pain. i want death. My heart and soul i take them back, they are shattered. I am numb, dead, destroyed. This sea of lies has ended. I just hope i fucking drown, God strike me down or ill do it for you.
Fuck humans. None of you are immortal. Fuck you all.
Fuck me for eating this bullshit.
i bled for you......

I use the word love carefully, I meant it both times. What have i received....nothing but pain.
i give all that i have to give. to make things work, why do i try, i should just stop, i hate myself, i want to die.

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The day, oh my [28 Jun 2003|11:03pm]
[ mood | Sober and scared ]

So yeah, today kind of sucked, but you know, theres been worse days, i slept most of the day, talked with my dad about his softball game, laughed a bit, i dunno i like watching the rodeo and classic VH1 with the folks, call me weird. Then pops and i got a burrito, i got to drive, i love driving with my dad, he tells me like yeah good turn, and all this shit. My mom just flips the FUCK out when i drive haha. Then i talked to Carley, then played my guitar, then heard there was a party it looked lame, so yeah when i was talking To Carley on the phone about curly fries, chris and rickey rolled up and told me to cruise, i havent seen chris in a while so we walked down the street. walked in to mias house, saw stephanie! oh man i love that girl! i talked her into giving me her old catholic school uniform, im gonna give it to CArley just for the hell of it. I saw LJ fucking i havent seen that guy in 3 years! shit man, but yeah, Sober people parties a pretty lame, espcially sober asian parties, every one thought they were hard, they were sitting arounf listening to weak ass hip hip acting hard cuz they got a lame hatchback, yeah real fun. I would have had more fun talking to Carley shit! oh well i saw some people i havent seen in a while. well im not drunk or stoned, so i guess thats a good thing right! one in a row!

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[28 Jun 2003|04:32pm]
Nine albums that are important to you:
[1] Opeth-black water park
[2] Cryptopsy-none so vile
[3] Dying fetus-killing on adrenoline
[5] My dying bride-the dreadful hours
[6] Carcass-necroticism:descanting the insalubrious
[7] Death-human
[8] Children of bodom- Follow the reaper
[9] Slayer- seasons in the abyss

Six of your favorite songs(currently)
[1] Opeth-deliverance
[2] Haunted- DOA
[3] The Black Dahlia murder- funeral thirst
[4] Cryptopsy- shroud
[5] Hypocrisy- apocolypse
[6] old mans child-black seeds on virgin soil

Three albums you've bought recently:

[1] Anathema-eternity
[2] Cryptopsy- none so live (montreal 2002)
[3] Opeth- deliverance

Two Artists you would like to do the NASTY with:
[1] Angela from arch enemy
[2] That chick from watch me burn (oh yeah i wonder if her hair i pink all over!)
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SECK MY FECK [28 Jun 2003|03:16pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

Im shaving my goat, it looks stupid and stringy, so im gonna wait a while to try again, My sides look good, Dame was diggin em so was Frank.
HAHA Frank Dosent drink any more and i saw him on the bench and i was like Dame? is frank drinking a beer? And He goes Yeah... and i was like No way! and dame tells me to go over and talk to frank. But Frank gets and walks towards me to say whats up. and it was a rock star! And Dame says to frank " I told Nelson you were drinkin a beer, and he was like No not Frank!" Frank started laughing at me. Franks a good guy, fun as hell to mosh with.
Im really down, maybe i should just go back to sleep =/

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the show [28 Jun 2003|02:04am]
[ mood | Drunk depressed and sore ]

ERic picked me up, then we went to Randys pad, no one home, then went to alex and chepos, then boned out with a couple fools. Got Gas and coke, in the Care, eric me vance and his 60 yr old white chick, i tried to act hard core for the chick.
We rolled up, went inside and were baffled! this place is huge! holy shit thats gonna be bad, but then we went into this little room, Where they were playing Death metal, this was the first of many let downs.
I went out side, smoke a ciggerette with eric,then waited for dame and them to roll up. they did and we talked to the guy, they might not have the show! what? so ok, then they changed the wrist bands, then they said, 18 and under had to leave by 10. Feck, im 17! Alex, talked him into giving me a wrist band. so i was cool. There were theese fools, from the band gate keeper, i swear, i know one of them, this guy jacob *think thats the guy i know any way**, he kept looking at me, i think it was one of sequoias freinds, i met him maybe 3 or 4 times, it was totaly him. Ill meet up with him later.
So eric baught me a forty i drank it with, Randy, Kim called, and played a mean ass joke on me, after that i wanted to go home.
i told my mom im staying at dames, but i came home, mikey dropped me off.
So i went in and watched her burn for a bit, moshed some with dame and frank, and those gatekeeper fools.
Then we went out side, met Ray dog, babs, Mikey, ryro, christian, Bens Girlfreind Jessica! Tom and rob blonko, christian. I met nadia, Erics Girl, man shes tiny, but shes really nice.she gave me a sticker!
And i walked in on the last part of the conversation with Vance and GEtto death. He was gonna leave or somthing, then he wasnt then they were gonna kick him out, then his chick said something, and chepo told her to shut up. Vance needs to stop smoking Crack, no seriously, he needs to stop smoking crack, he runs off and dissappears and smokes crack....... not cool.
Mikey babs and i got some food, big mistake, i felt like i was gonna puke.
Getto Death starts playing i got in and head for the pit, start going ape shit, Gatekeepers moshing, Frank, and Ray dog mosh, one guy from half dead was there, moshing, some punker fool, and 2 mexican tough guys muahahah how fun! I was in the pit for the whole set, I got elbowed in the head, socked in the eye, i cant see right out of it. no blood, i wonder how many pits is that with no blood. im sore, my neck hurts, i got bruises all of my body, it was a good pit, got pretty rwody at times, i didnt eat shit though! thats good. After the pit, i sat down, and this chick i know said i was Hardcore, that made me smile.
Mikey Gave me a ride home. no one was awake, i hope i dont get in trouble, i was home by 12 15 though...so i dunno im suppose to be at damanaitors. oh well. i didnt know what time they were gonna be done. Bah.
This sucks, i hate this, Oh well, im used nothing going my way any. Lifes nothing but a bunch of dissapointments, but hey, if the world didnt suck wed all fall off.
I wish i would have been thrashed in the pit, Hard core thrashed, thats how i feel anyway. =/ fuck being 17 with no license, im got start hadling shit my self, instad of trying to rely on other people, No body gives a fuck any way. Fuck it all ARRRRGGG, sometimes i just want to scream. sometimes, i just want to take the knife, and just HAVE AT IT! woooo. not tonight, im to tired, Carley prolly drunk off her ass, im not gonna bring her down fuck it, I dont like getting drunk any more, Ray dog was pissing me off..... bah

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THinking, aboot Carley Jean [27 Jun 2003|11:49am]
[ mood | anxious ]

This is gonna sound really sappy, but i was just thinking how beautiful Carley is..... Her face is always in my head. Its pretty Crazy

So yeah, why does my mother feel the need to wake me up every morning after a long night of drinking! Christ mom lemmie get some sleep!

i have to vacuum, i dont have to feed the dog, i might go to grandpas to wash a car or two for some more dough. For food and what not for tonight, erics picking me up at around 7 30, i hope Carley can go, for the love of God!
I called Joey twice yesterday, haha everytime this week i wanted to talk to him, hes been busy, shit, i have to today, i dont have a choice. I dunno, he could kill me and kick my ass, but i dunno, if he feels that strongly about that, then i wouldnt care. Ill just be sure to be really faded. =) i dont think hes gonna beat me up tonight, which is good. Ill be extra stoned just in case though.

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Bleh [27 Jun 2003|11:09am]
I joined La Metal community, how fun.
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